Even as a young boy, Merle Haggard had a restless spirit that couldn’t be tamed. "I was 11 years old when I first hopped a freight train," the legendary country music icon once said. "There was this deep, inner yearning that I didn’t fully understand back then—and honestly, I still can’t fully explain now—that pushed me to jump those freights in search of something. I didn’t know what it was, but I had to find out." That spirit of adventure, combined with his raw talent, would later define him as one of the most influential figures in country music history.
The Search for Redemption
Merle Haggard, who passed away in 2016 on his 79th birthday, spent much of his life searching for something deeper—a sense of peace, belonging, and redemption. It wasn’t until later in life that he realized what he was truly after. "I think what I’ve always looked for in life is my father’s approval," Merle reflected. "That was the biggest thing I was robbed of. And it took me down many paths. It motivated me to do what I did. Always making a new record, always writing another song. Who knows? It may have inspired everything." His journey wasn’t just about music; it was about finding closure for a childhood marked by tragedy and rebellion.
A Life Shaped by Loss
According to Marc Eliot, author of the insightful biography The Hag, "Merle blamed himself for his father’s death." This heart-wrenching event, which occurred when Merle was just 9 years old, became the defining moment of his life. The loss sent him spiraling into a life of rebellion, leading to years of hard living, five marriages, and even a stint in San Quentin State Prison. But instead of breaking him, those experiences fueled his art. "Merle never became the symbol of the underdog," Eliot told Closer Weekly. "He became the symbol of rebellion." Through his struggles, Merle reshaped country music, bringing a level of sophistication and intensity that had never been seen before. "He brought a depth to the genre that changed everything," Eliot explained. "And let’s not forget, he put Bakersfield on the map!"
Read also:Hoda Kotbs Life Beyond The Spotlight Makeupfree And Loving It
A Musical Awakening
Merle Haggard was born in Bakersfield, California, in 1937, two years after his parents moved there from Oklahoma. Music was always a part of his life. "Merle used to come onto the big easy chair and sit on his dad’s lap and listen to music," Eliot recalled. But that sense of normalcy was shattered when Merle found his father half-paralyzed by a stroke in that very chair. The trauma sent him spiraling into a life of crime, including hopping trains and stealing. After multiple arrests and a teenage marriage to Leona Hobbs, Merle eventually ended up in San Quentin. "That judge had it in for him because he’d seen him so many times," Eliot explained. Merle never forgot the horrors he witnessed during his time in prison. "God, that does something to a man’s mind that never heals up right," he said.
A New Beginning
Merle’s life took a dramatic turn when he saw Johnny Cash perform at San Quentin in 1959. "He knew he could do it after he saw Cash," Eliot said. "Here was a guy who did it, who also came from nothing." Inspired by Cash’s performance, Merle dedicated himself to music. Upon his release from San Quentin in 1960, he began performing, and by 1964, he scored his first hit with "Sing a Sad Song." In 1969, "Okie From Muskogee," a heartfelt tribute to his dad, hit No. 1. Through his music, Merle found a way to channel his pain into something beautiful, touching the lives of countless fans along the way.
—Lisa Chambers, with reporting by Amanda Champagne-Meadows
For more on this story, pick up the latest issue of Closer magazine, on newsstands now.
